My original intention about shame, was to drag it out into the open, out of isolation, blasting it with Light and Love. Ha! Not sure if you heard the irony in that last sentence, but dragging anything out in the open is not done with the intention of Love ~ Light, yes, but Light without Love is simple judgment.
How many of us want to be dragged onto a stage where we already know we're being brutally judged. Willingly walking on that same stage takes a courage that many of us don't realize we do indeed have, but being dragged means your not willing. And, when we're not willing that is breeding ground for resentment. So, instead of adding resentment on top of shame & wonder why it didn't work, I invite you read how i approach shame differently now, and also invite you to try something different in your life today.
My 'something different' consists of getting to know an energy that triggers me and/or scares me. Instead of running away, or containing or rejecting it - i turn to face it now. This letter is just one way i work with an energy that seems unapproachable inside.
Hello Shame, I have a new intention.
Thank you for allowing me to explain. I've realized you are an energy, just like I am, just like we all are - we are made of energy. You, being an energy that I believed was MINE, was ME, I didn't know I had a choice to have you in my life. So, unconsciously of course, I blamed you for making me feel like i was something that didn't belong in this world when really it was my own limiting belief. Instead of talking to you and finding out this truth, I admit, I avoided talking to you for a very long time. I personally know what it feels like to be avoided - not such a loving feeling is it? Thank you for teaching me that the Law of Cause and Affect, aka karma, really does start inside. You helped me stay hidden, unseen and therefore I felt that false sense of security.
(Some energies are a low vibration. We've been taught (I've been taught) that low vibrations are 'not good'. And yet, radio waves are a low vibration that carry our voice, our messages and connect us over distances that otherwise, higher vibrations (or frequencies) would have blown out. And, in music, it's the low vibrations that gives depth to a song creating harmony.
I have misjudged you and i'm so sorry, please forgive me, thank you and I do now accept that you do have a purpose in this world and in my life. You are a deep vibration. You add depth and character to me and people who chose to meet with you, speak with you and learn from you. I'm also sorry that my original intention was to 'drag' you out into the open. I have learned you are shy and if i am forceful, you know how to make a situation explode, creating more shame. I have learned that if I continue to drag you out, just to humiliate you with the idea that you'll go away - the simple laws of cause and affect kick in - and all i'm really doing is dragging myself into situations that are shameful. If I continue to do that, what i really need to look at isn't you, shame - it's why I feel I need you in my life. It seems to me, now that I've talked to you, that I only create more shameful situations to hide the one I asked you to keep a strong hold on in the first place.
I've also spent the time to look back at where this belief came from, to realized that other people, just like me, didn't know how that deal with, or handle you, shame, in our life. The way I was taught to deal with something uncomfortable was to distract others by showing them you, shame, in their life. This way, they'd be so distracted trying to cover up and explain you, shame, away, they wouldn't see that you, shame, are in my life as well and judge me. I wouldn't have to feel what made me feel so ashamed in the first place. I could keep that isolated, contained and avoided. But here's the thing - doing that to you, shame, back fired and i ended up isolating, containing and avoiding myself.
That took me awhile to get to my new intention, but here it is: Shame, i intend to let you go. Although that may mean that what I asked you to contain will come out, i am willing to face the judgments of others, knowing that the only reason they judge me, is because they are simply trying to distract me from seeing (sensing) that there is something in their life, that they hate themselves for and blame it on shame. I Am willing to hold space, showing us a way to accept ourself - for where there is acceptance, not judgment, there is Divine Love.
Are you willing to speak to your shame, releasing it's strong hold on you so that you can receive the gift of Love in your life? I may not be ready, but I am wiling.